26th Sunday of Ordinary Time, Cycle A - September 27, 2020

 26th Sunday of Ordinary Time

Cycle A

September 27, 2020

Our Lady of Grace Parish, Parkton 8:30am

 

Self-Filling

 

Have you ever said or heard someone else say: “He’s really full of himself?” Or: “She’s really full of herself?”  

 

I am not recommending that we say this. It is a put-down and not a very kind remark.

 

But, for our purposes this morning, the expression is helpful. What it means is that a person is so full of himself that they have no room for anyone else.

 

It means that a person is so taken up with their own importance or opinions or accomplishments that they don’t let anyone else in. They are not interested in what others are doing or thinking or in how they are feeling.

 

Often a person like this dominates a conversation. These are some of the things that the expression “being full of yourself” means.  

 

Self-Emptying 

 

This is in sharp contrast to what Saint Paul is talking about today.

 

Paul says: “Have in you the same attitude that is also in Christ Jesus.” He describes this attitude a bit, and the heart of it is in one sentence.

 

“Humbly regard others as more important than yourselves, each looking out not for their own interests, but also for those of others.” So, in contrast to being full of ourselves, Paul really calls us to empty ourselves.

 

In fact, in this same passage, Paul says: “Christ Jesus did not regard equality with God as something to be grasped. Rather, he emptied himself, becoming human and obedient even to death on a cross.”

 

This is the self-emptying of God and of Jesus, and Paul calls us to adopt this same attitude. I am thinking of two ways for us to do this.

 

Emptying Ourselves for Christ 

 

First, we need to empty ourselves for Christ himself.

 

This means that we are to allow Christ to fill us more and more and never stop this process. We are to see Christ and not ourselves as the all- important one.

 

Emptying ourselves for Christ means that we are not complacent. We do not look at our understanding of faith or our relationship with Jesus as perfect.

 

Instead, we seek a fuller understanding of Scripture and how it applies to us. We see ourselves as always in need of growth.

 

Emptying ourselves for Christ means that we come to Mass not just to fulfill an obligation, but really to lift up our minds and hearts to God. We want to receive Communion, Holy Communion, because we want a real communion of life with Christ. 

 

Emptying Ourselves for the Common Good

 

So, we empty ourselves for Christ, and then we are to empty ourselves for the common good.

 

The term “common good” is a traditional part of our Catholic moral teaching.  It means that we look beyond our own self-interest to the greater good of all.

 

Emptying ourselves for the common good means that I am thinking not just of my own well-being.  Instead, I care about what we collectively have to do to care for everyone, especially the vulnerable and the poor.

 

This could be me and my family, or me and the people with whom I work. It could be me and the people in my community, or me and the people in my country, or me and the people in the entire world. 

 

Emptying ourselves for the common good is not always easy. But, in fact, I think that the desire to do this is built into our spiritual DNA, and we will find peace and joy only if we get into the flow of doing this. 

 

Conclusion

 

So, “have in you the same attitude that is also in Christ.”

 

“He emptied himself for our sakes, even to dying on the cross.” Instead of being full of ourselves, we are to empty ourselves, first for Christ and then for the common good of all.

24th Sunday of Ordinary Time, Cycle A - September 13, 2020

 24^th Sunday in Ordinary Time

 Cycle A

September 13, 2020

Our Lady of Grace Parish, Parkton 11:00am 

 

Forgive

This morning, the message is about forgiveness.

I suppose that’s pretty obvious after listening to the gospel. Jesus says that we are to forgive “seventy-seven times.”  

In the Hebrew culture, the number seven was symbolic of perfection or fullness. So, when Jesus says to forgive seventy-seven times, he’s saying that our forgiveness is to be infinite and is to reflect God’s unconditional love of us. 

This morning, I want to look at three things that forgiving is not. And then I want to look at three steps that are involved in the process – and yes, forgiving is a process – three steps that are involved in the process of forgiving.

Forgiving Is Not… 

First, forgiving does not mean that we deny our feelings or pretend that we weren’t offended.

In fact, part of healthy forgiving demands that we own or admit our feelings. We do this so that we can eventually work through the hurt.

Second, forgiving does not mean forgetting or trying to pretend that something never happened.

It’s almost impossible to forget what has happened, even if we want to. We cannot expect ourselves or others to do this.

And third, forgiving is not losing as if we are in a win/lose game. 

Instead, forgiving can be a win/win action. The one forgiving and the one forgiven can both come out ahead.

So, forgiving does not mean 1) denying our feelings, 2) forgetting, or 3) losing. 

Forgiving Is

Now let’s look at three steps or actions that are involved in forgiving. 

1.    Review 

First, we need to review what happened.

Review in your mind what the other person did. Try to remember it in detail.

And as you do this, get in touch with your feelings. How did you feel as it happened and right after it happened, and how do you feel about it or about him or her right now?

And, as part of this review, we also need to look at ourselves. As the old saying goes, “It often takes two to tango.”

Is there some way, maybe something minor or subtle, but some way that I contributed to the problem? Could it have been how I said something or when or where I did something? 

2.    Humanize

So, 1) review what happened, and then, 2) humanize the offender. 

Try to separate the hurtful word or action from the person who did it. And then, try to walk in that person’s shoes for a bit.

What might she have been experiencing within herself? What kind of day or week might she have had?

Or, what kind of home life did he have when he was a child? What woundedness might he be carrying around inside. 

This can be a very challenging part of the process that we may not want to do, but still, try to humanize the offender. Try to step back from the hurt for a moment and allow some empathy to enter the process. 

3.    Choose

And then the third step or action is to choose to forgive.

We may feel resentful, angry or vengeful. But even with that, we can still choose to let go of it – and yes, forgiving is a choice.  

Not to let go hurts us as much or even more than the other person. The Buddhists have a saying about this.  

They say that holding on to resentment is like picking up a hot coal in our hand with the intention of throwing it at the person who offended us. I think that this image makes it clear that choosing to let go is as important for us as it is for the other person.  

And then, eventually, when you are ready and when it is possible, try to talk with the other person. This is not always possible, but when it is, it gives life to the forgiveness and makes it very real.

Conclusion

So, at some point in our lives, each of us will have to deal with a situation where we were hurt. 

It can happen with anyone – a parent, a spouse, a son or daughter, a sibling, a friend, a neighbor, an employer, a priest, and on it goes.  I hope that these three steps or actions – 1) Review, 2) Humanize, and 3) Choose – I hope that they will help us respond to Jesus’ call to be forgiving.